Snape -- After the Murder!
by PotterFanFication
Summary: Severus Snape murdered Albus Dumbledore. He has reached the point of no return. The missing part of Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince written with the POV of Snape.


The gloomy night sky, glistened with the dark mark. Severus Snape held Draco Malfoy by the neck, as he rushed past the commotion. He had not expected it to happen tonight. He was not prepared. His world had suddenly turned upside down. His beloved home, his Hogwarts was burning. He could hear voices of Weasley boy, Granger, Longbottom shouting curses. How did they turn up so soon? Had they been expecting the breach? Most importantly, how could he save them?

Severus was too shocked to reason. He just acted on instinct. His eyes roved behind only to realize that kids were expertly duelling with the death eaters. Something about Dumbledore's Army came to his mind. He breathed in relief. He heard the boy running behind him with surprising speed. The dratted Potter boy. He soundlessly cancelled every spell the boy threw at him. The boy was out for the kill, his curses intented to hurt and his aim wasn't bad, but the shouting made him lose precious seconds, during which Severus being a master dueller swiftly and voicelessly cancelled them.

Hagrid's hut was burning. Severus saw everything happen, in clear slow motion, he felt as if the sounds of the world had been muted off, as if they all did not matter. Hagrid's voice pierced threw the numbness, the big dog of Hagrid howled in pain, he could now hear distant voice of other professors... but nothing sunk in, he kept walking. He cancelled yet another deadly curse from the boys, the hate in the voice for too much to bear, this was the same boy whom he had sworn to protect, for whom he had become a spy and for whom he had to kill Dumbledore.. When he heard the boy shouting

"Sectum — !" Severus lashed out.

He flicked his wand and the curse was repelled yet again; the boy was mere feet away now, He turned to face the enraged boy...

'Levi —' started the boy...

"No, Potter!"

Severus felt hatred and revulsion just as it had been before he had cursed Dumbledore.

"You dare use my own spells against me, Potter? It was I who invented them — I, the Half-Blood Prince! And you'd turn my inventions on me, like your filthy father, would you? I don't think so . . . no!"

The boy was thrown afar away from his wand, he lay defenceless. Severus regretted as death eaters took it upon themselves to torture the idiot boy. With his quick thinking he saved the boy yet again, thanklessly.

'Kill me then? Kill me like you killed him?', screamed the boy in rage and contempt. Severus blanked, stared at the boy a moment as the boys green eyes shined brilliantly. Severus turned strangely unpertubed.'Coward, fight back', the boy taunted him again. And it boiled over, all the hate between Potter and him spilled over, the animosity that had been always been simmering on the background from the minute Potter boy stepped into Hogwarts, or rather from the minute he saw James Potter smirk at him from an old train compartment. The moment of truth.. He lost it..

"DON'T-" screamed Severus, he felt demented, inhuman, as though he was in as much pain as the yelping, howling dog stuck in the burning house behind them- "CALL ME COWARD!"

With that he had thrown the boy off his track, possibly hurt the boy more than he intended to. It was crazy that now the boy's contempt equalled his own and that somehow comforted Severus. The boy was supposed to hate him. They boy was supposed to hate him with all his might. He- Severus Severus didn't deserve redemption, he hated himself too much for it.

With one last look at the castle, Severus reached the apparition point and vanished on spot. He pushed Draco on to the dark path that lead to Malfoy Manor, hoping against hope that he his whiplash had not caused the boy to bleed out on spot and that the remaning death eaters would follow.

Naricissa's surprised voice greeted him. Draco Malfoy hugged his mom and sobbed like a baby. Severus blinked. He realized Dumbledore had been right, Draco still had a soul, pampered yet whole and untainted by the dark arts. 'Dumbledore is Dead!''Dumbledore is Dead!''Dumbledore is Dead!', His insides screamed in a sympathetic lament, as Bella danced to chants. Bella, the werewof, Lucius had returned ... most were missing. Small relief that Hogwarts students and staff fought back.

Everything felt schizophrenic. His thoughts and actions didn't match. Nothing made sense. He hugged and danced with people whom he felt like slapping and hurting. He laughed aloud when he felt like tearing his hair in despair. The celebrations went all night. The intoxicating drinks however burnt his throat, he no longer understood if it was the bottled grief or heart burn that caused it.

Sometime during the night, Severus untangled himself from the mass of drunken bodies and curled into a foetus position on a comfortable chair and cried his heart out. Bella mistaking Severus's howls to be laughs, started laughing herself. He drifted into uneasy sleep, in which Dumbledore's face moved in and out, were they dreams or just deep thoughts, Severus couldn't differentiate. Severus hadn't mourned this way after Lily's death. Some student deaths had in the past shocked him, but this level of grief he had thought to have outgrown.

He came back to Spinners End to rest. After a full day of headache which he had no intention of curing using a potion, (as if to punish himself), he gazed through the headlines of the dailyprophet, elegies and odes to Dumbledore. His eyes burned, his throat felt heavy... He indulged into the sorrow. He wanted to skip the parts that called him the murderer. But he couldn't help but notice that the Potter boy had witnessed the entire showdown between Draco and Dumbledore before and after the death eaters arrived. Interfering idiot, with absolutely no respect for rules, the professor in him murmured, though he realized Potter and Dumbledore must have been in one of their mysteriously infuriating meetings.

A swish of red, and a loud crash of something heavy being dropped, he saw that Fawkes had dropped a heavy package and vanished. He opened it, to find a painting of an ugly old wizard. But he knew Dumbledore's portrait lay beneath it. Relief rushed through him. The meddling old man, didn't leave. The presence of the portrait comforted him more than he could admit.

(Continued)...


End file.
